Date: Sat, 15 Feb 1997
***Please don't send to ATXC***
Disclaimer: The characters in this story belong to Chris
1013 productions. They are portrayed wonderfully by David Duchovny and
Gillian Anderson. I am just borrowing them for the time being and
promise to return them once I am finished.
Authors Notes: Huge Thanks goes to Rebecca and Cheryl for editing this
Summary: Mulder and Scully have a fight, Mulder drives off mad, will
he survive the consequences?
Classification: MSR, Angst
Rating: PG-for language
Send all comments to firstname.lastname@example.org
by Laurie Sarnacki
The door bell rang just as Dana Scully had finished drawing
nightly bath. <Who could that be?> Her mother was out of town and she
had just left Mulder from work.
"Who is it?" she called from the bathroom.
"Scully, its me, Mulder. Can I come in?"
<What now?> "Sure Mulder-- hold on." She
grabbed her sweats and tugged
them on. She walked out of the bathroom and down the hall to her
front door. Mulder though, had already let himself in.
"I used my key," he said sheepishly.
"I noticed! So Mulder, to what do I owe this visit to? I
you no more than 45 minutes ago. You couldn't have possibly gotten
into trouble in that short of time!" she smiled.
"Aww Scully-- you know me," (flopping onto her
couch). "Actually I'm
here because just as you left, something interesting landed in my
<Sure, make yourself at home.> "Mulder, what are
you talking about?"
dropping into the chair adjacent to him.
"Well, remember about a week ago when we got that file on
girls? The ones that had disappeared mysteriously without a trace
after their Senior Prom?" He handed her the file he had been
"Yes, and?" She perused the file. It was filled with
sightings and a
time line dating back to 1988. <Why do I let him do this?>
"Well, it just so happens that our 'paranoid' friends the
came across it too. They had some very interesting information on the
whole thing. It seems these girls... well, lets just say they were not
of this world."
"Mulder, I'm no mood for any of your off the wall
theories! I've read
all the police reports and I believe that the two girls were abducted"
"I am in total agreement with you Scully. I just don't
they were abducted by the same people you think they were. I think
they were taken home."
"What? Mulder....." Scully replied looking more than
exasperated. "Why can't you ever just see a simple answer to
"Scully look-- how many times have the Lone Gunmen been
once as far as I can remember. This is real Scully, I can feel it.
We leave for Maine tomorrow, 9:00 AM."
"Yes, I'll pick you up at 7."
"Wait, Mulder. Did Skinner okay this?"
"Well, not exactly."
"What?" she was in disbelief. What had he gotten himself into now?
"Scully, he would never okay this, you know that."
"Scully I need your help on this one. I think there is
going on in that town and I have to find out what it is. This is not
the first time two girls have disappeared from there. It happened
before--ten years ago to the day. And they never turned up. Until
this day there has been no one has ever recovered any trace as to what
happened to them."
"Mulder, I'm not doing this."
"You heard me!" She said angrily.
"I can't believe you just said that." Mulder looked confused.
"Well I did!"
"Fine, Scully! Don't come! I'll do it on my own!"
"Mulder-- It's just.... " She shook her head.
"This feels like a
setup to me. You're going to end up hurt or killed one day. I have
seen it for a long time now. I just never said anything." She choked
back her salty tears.
"Is that what you really think?" He said, getting up from the couch.
"What else am I supposed to think? Can you tell me that?
times are you going to put your life on the line to follow one of your
theories before it kills you?"
"Scully, that's the difference between you and me. I am a
open-minded. You-- you are just a cold hearted scientist who will
never open herself up to new possibilities." He said spitefully.
"Get out Mulder! Get out of my apartment and out of my
shouted, tears running down her face.
"You don't have to tell me twice." Slamming the door
and storming out
of her apartment.
* it was a demand -an order, not a request..
Scully stood there for a while, too shocked to move. She let
tears flow freely. She knew a confrontation like this was a long time
in coming. Her feelings for Fox Mulder had evolved over the past year
or so from partnership to friendship to love. She really hadn't meant
half the things she'd said to him, but she just couldn't stop
herself. Now he was off on a wild goose chase and she could only think
that this might be the last one he ever went on.
Mulder got into his car and sped off. How could she say things like
that to him? It wasn't what she had said that had hurt him, it was
the fact that it had come from her. His closest ally and friend, the
only person he had trusted in a long time. Now she had told him to
get out of her life. <Well who needs her?> "I do" He silently added.
Having no where else to go he continued to drive around. It
started to rain pretty hard since he had left Scullys' apartment. He
still couldn't get over that fact that his only friend had told him to
get lost. As he drove on he became more deep in thought; he was
unaware of how slick the road had become. Mulder was so deep in
thought that he didn't see the truck coming head on to him.
Mulder swerved to miss the oncoming truck and lost control,
fishtailed all over the road.
He slammed on the brakes but his efforts were too late. At
moment, Fox Mulder hit the car head on. He didn't know what happened
next, only that he had been hurt badly and couldn't feel anything but
numbness. Mulder fought to keep consciousness, which was a feat in
and of itself. The urge to sleep came on more strongly and eventually
he couldn't fight it anymore He could only hope that someone had seen
the accident and that help was on the way.
Dana Scully hadn't moved from the chair she was sitting in since he
had left. She still couldn't believe the things she had said to him.
"Why is love so hard?" She asked herself. Maybe it wasn't hard if
both people felt the same way, but when it was one- sided it was a
whole other ball game. She had stopped crying an hour ago, though her
face was still sticky with tears.
She didn't expect to hear from him that night. Maybe tomorrow
would give him a call and apologize. As for tonight the pain was
still raw and she wasn't able to face those demons again. She got up
from her chair, walked across the room to the kitchen and put the
kettle on to make some tea.
She replayed the events of that night over in her head. How it
had started she was not too sure. She didn't know where all that rage
she had had come from. She was just scared, scared that he might get
killed one of these days going off in search for the "Truth", as he
liked to call it. But what exactly was the truth? How did he know
that it wasn't just another lie made up by the Government to have him
go on wild goose chase. The thing with Mulder was that he never
thought of that possibility. For a guy who claimed to trust no one
but her, he was pretty easily persuaded when it came to extreme
As for herself, she knew she had a tendency to only look at
obvious answer. She was so reluctant to believe anything outside the
realm of Science. That is why she and Mulder made such a great team;
she kept him grounded and he taught her how to believe. And now they
might have lost it all over a stupid fight. She would call him
tomorrow and straighten everything out, or at least try. It made her
sick to her stomach> knowing he was out there, alone, and probably
very hurt. The loud shrill of the kettle whistling broke her train of
thought and she got up to make her tea.
The man that had been driving behind Mulder was in shock. He had just
gotten off-duty from work. Out of all his years of being a cop he had
never seen an accident that looked this bad. He grabbed his cell
phone and called 911.
"911 emergency, how can I help you?"
"Yes, this is Sgt. Muloney. I am on highway 99 and there
has been an
accident. We need an ambulance here right away! I am in between exit
293 and 294. Please hurry, it's awful!"
"Okay. Sir, do you know if there are any injuries? How
"Only two cars involved, but as for injuries-- well if
it's a miracle," he said, trying to stay calm.
"Okay Mr.Muloney, an ambulance is on its way. I'm going
to keep you
on the line 'til it gets there, okay?"
Fox Mulder was in a dark place he had never been. At least, he
*think* he had been there before, yet even so it felt familiar. There
was a light far off in the distance, a light so bright and mesmerizing
he felt himself drawn to it.
The Paramedics arrived at the scene approximatly five minutes
Mr. Muloney described as best he could to them how the accident had
happened. Though it happened so fast it was hard for him. The driver
of the car that hit Mulder was dead on impact. There was nothing they
could do; his jugular had been severed and he died instantly. Fox was
barely alive, his heartbeat irregular and his breathing slow and
"This one looks like he might make it."
"He will if we can get him out of the car!"
The two paramedics knew they wouldn't be able to pull Mulder
the car without doing permanent damage to him. They needed the Jaws
of Life to pry the indented car door. They radioed their dispatch and
within minutes it was there. Firemen worked feverishly to pry the
door open. Finally, after a lot of struggle it gave free. The
paramedics lifted Mulders limp body from the twisted steel once known
as a car.
"His wallet says his name is Fox Mulder and he is a
Special Agent with
They laid him on a stretcher and placed him in the back of the
ambulance, arriving within minutes at the hospital. Fox's blood
pressure was beginning to drop and his heartbeat was faint. The
doctors got him prepped for surgery and tried to contact his
emergency contact, Scully.
Her tea was almost ready when her phone rang. The first
came to her mind was that it was Mulder. She ran over to where the
phone was with the mug of tea in her hand.
"Is this Special Agent Dana Scully?"
"Yes it is. Who is this?"
"It says here that you are the emergency contact of Fox
"Yes it is. What's wrong?" She felt her heartbeat
"Ms. Scully, I am afraid your partner was in a terrible
He is in surgery right now at County Hospital. He is in critical
condition and I think it's best if you get here as soon as you can."
"I'm coming now." She hung up the phone, grabbed her
purse and keys
and ran out the door.
The drive to the hospital was a total blur to Scully-- she wasn't even
sure how she had made it there. The events of that night kept
replaying in her mind. "If only he hadn't gone off mad!" she told
herself. She walked into the emergency room of the hospital and
proceeded to make her way to the admitting desk.
"Could you please tell me where I could find Special
Agent Fox Mulder?
I just received a call saying he was brought in here."
"Hold on a second miss..."
"Scully, Dana Scully; he's my partner."
"Alright Miss Scully, I will page the doctor for
Thoughts raced through her head; she was feeling so much dread
guilt because of what had happened. She felt the whole accident was
her fault. If Mulder made it through this she promised herself that
she would tell him how she felt and that she was sorry for everything.
She began to sob as all the night's trauma finally took its toll on
"Miss Scully?" said a soft voice behind her.
"Yes, are you the doctor?"
He nodded "Can we sit down?" He motioned over to a
bench sitting at
the far end of the waiting room.
"Doctor, how bad is it?"
"Well Miss Scully, he has had a severe car accident. It's
he even made it out alive. He has a fractured wrist, some deep
bruising on his legs, but what we are most worried about is the extent
of his head injuries. There was some bleeding but we've managed to
stop that. He is in a coma now, and we are unsure of when he might
come out of that."
Dana sighed and allowed all of what the doctor said sink in.
"Of course. Follow me."
She got up and followed him down the intensive care hallway.
sterile smell was enough to remind her of autopsy times. The doctor
stopped in front of room 304. "He is in here for now, and until he
wakes up he will stay in here."
"Thank you, Doctor. Has anyone else been contacted?"
"Not that I know of. If you give me the numbers of who
needs to be
contaced, I will have someone do that for you." he said, handing her a
pen and a pad of paper.
Dana wrote down Mulder's mom's, her mom's and Skinner's phone
numbers. "Thank you. The third number is my mother's- - she would
want to know what happened too."
Dana stared at the numbers on the door; just beyond was her
six years lying hooked up to machines keeping him alive. She pushed
the door open and walked into the sterile, white room. She let it all
sink in: the machines, the whooshing of the oxygen being pumped into
his body, and the sight of him lying helpless on the bed. She slowly
walked over to his bed; he looked so peaceful lying there. It was
enough to start her crying again. She walked over to where the chair
was in the room and pulled it closer to the bed.
"Miss Scully?" she heard a soft voice behind her.
"Yes?" Dana said, as she turned around to see who
was there. It was a
nurse with a blanket and pillow.
"My name is Nurse Jenkins. I thought you might like
these; I had a
feeling you might be staying the night."
"You're very welcome. Oh, by the way, the best thing for
you to do is
just talk to him. The sound of your voice may just be the thing to
wake him up." And with that she left as quietly as she had entered.
<My voice. Isn't that ironic; the one thing that could wake
had practically gotten him here in the first place. Dammit, Dana! If
you hadn't been so damn self-ritous he might not be here.> She was in
deep blame. She knew in her head it wasn't her fault; it was her
heart that didn't understand.
She sat in the cold leather seat, wrapped the blanket around
and took hold of his hand stroking it gently.
"Mulder, it's me, Scully. Can you hear me?" She felt
a little stupid
talking to him, but she knew what the nurse had said was true.
Sometimes familiar things woke up comatose patients.
"Mulder come on-- it's me, Scully."
"Fox, come on! I know how you hate it when I call you
that. Come on
and tell me to call you Mulder!" She stared at him for a moment.
"Mulder, I need you to listen to me. I am so sorry for
how I acted
before. We both said a lot of stuff we didn't mean. But you can't go
and die on me because I would be lost without you." She leaned over
and whispered into his ear "I think you know that Mulder; we both
would be lost without each other."
She leaned her head on his chest and listened to his
heartbeat; it was
strong and steady. <Well, that is a good sign>.
"Mulder," she stroked his hand "Please wake up. I am so sorry."
Slowly the tears built up in Scully's eyes; she relived the
had over and over again. She laid her head on his chest and began to
cry again. She was crying so hard she didn't notice the hand on her
"Dana, honey, stop crying. It will be okay. Fox is a
strong man-- he
will come out of this."
"Mom? I thought you were out of town?"
"I came back late last night. As soon as I received the
call from the
hospital I came here. Dana, what happened?"
"Oh Mom, its all my fault! We got in a huge
fight...," She said,
getting up and falling into her mothers arms.
"Shhh... Dana honey, it's okay. Now calm down and tell me
"Mom, it was so awful-- we fought...and he left,"
She tried choking
out the words, but her sobbing was uncontrollable at this point.
"Come on honey, sit down." Mrs. Scully motioned over
to where Dana
had been sitting and helped her sit down. "Now Dana, you have to calm
down and tell me what happened. It can't be that bad." She crouched
down and put her arms around her now shaking daughter.
"But Mom, it is. You see, Mulder came over and said he
had a new
assignment for us, though AD Skinner didn't know about it. I was so
angry with him; he is always doing things like that!" She said in
Maggie handed her some tissues.
"Alright honey, go on."
"And, well, I told him I wasn't going. Then he said some
I said some mean things. I told him to get out of my life, Mom!" She
placed her head on her mother's shoulder and cried 'til she felt as if
she had no tears left.
"Oh Dana, I am so sorry. I know you both didn't mean
said. you have got to know that this is not your fault! The other
driver was drunk; he probably never even saw Fox."
"Shh, honey. Why don't you try and get some sleep?"
"Mom, I can't sleep. I need to be here for Mulder-- it's
"Dana, stop blaming yourself! You weren't the driver that
hit him and
you didn't force Fox to drive away mad."
"But if I had only..."
"Dana, that is enough. Fox is a big boy-- he never does
doesn't want to do. He has a will to live, and he will come through
"I hope your right, Mom."
"Dana, wasn't it Fox who told me that you were going to
be all right
when you were missing?"
Dana winced at the bringing up of her disappearance. It was a
subject for her still; she had had a hard time coming to terms with
the three months she was missing. Her mother had told her how Mulder
had reacted during that time, and it wasn't pretty to hear her mom
tell it. When Melissa was alive she told her he had almost lost it
one night in his apartment. Now she might lose him and she wasn't
sure how she could face her world with out Fox Mulder.
"I know Mom, but..."
"And wasn't it you who told Mrs. Mulder that Fox would be
he was presumed dead in the fire?"
"No more 'buts', Dana. You two have a connection. One
stronger then both of you. It's what keeps you together; it binds
you, and it always will."
"Mom, I know, I do. In my heart Mulder is more than a
best friend. I do feel connected with him, but is this connection
enough to make him want to live?"
"I don't know, honey. But you can't give up hope that it
is what will
bring him back to you. Now, will you please try and get some rest?"
"Okay, but will you stay and keep an eye on him for me?
That is the
only way I will try to sleep."
"Of course, honey."
A little while later Scully fell asleep due to exhaustion.
looked at her young daughter with worry lines on her face. This
experience was taking its toll on her. She knew that her daughter's
feelings for her partner had changed over the past little while. She
just hoped and prayed Fox would come out of this okay.
She walked over to where the other chair was and pulled it to
other side of the bed. She then pulled the blanket up around her
sleeping daughter and sat down.
"Now, Fox, we have to have a little talk. It seems that
you and my
daughter have had a falling out. Well, let me tell you something-
Fox, you mean the world to her! I see it every time she looks at
you. If you leave her now she will never forgive you or herself. She
needs you, Fox," Maggie soothed as she stroked his hand and forehead.
"And I'll tell you another thing- if you do leave her and
move on, her
father will be mighty displeased with you and will let you know it
when he sees you!" Maggie smiled at the thought of William.
"So Fox, this argument you had with Dana, from what she
tells me it
was pretty horrific. Why does love hurt so much?" Maggie continued
talking to him, as if he was going to respond to her.
Throughout the night nurses and doctors periodically came in
checked on Fox. However, no changes in his condition were apparent.
Maggie had dozed off about forty-five minutes after her daughter and
was somewhat aware of the people entering and exiting the room.
It was about 6:00 AM when Dana started stirring and woke up.
she was unaware of her surroundings. The whole previous night seemed
like a dream to her, until she caught a glimpse of the man in the bed
next to her. "Oh Fox," she said softly, "Why did you go off mad?" She
grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly. Looking over at her mother
she realized how lucky she was to have her.
"Mulder come on, wake up! I am so sorry for what I said--
you know I
didn't mean it. You can't stay asleep forever!" She lightly smiled at
the thought. She knew that Mulder hardly slept at all, and the idea of
him sleeping forever... her eyes began to well up with tears again.
"Ms. Scully, may I have a word with you?" It was the
doctor from the
"Of course. What is it?" She quickly wiped the tears
"Well, at 9:00 AM this morning we have one of the top
coming in to take a look at Mr. Mulder's case, as requested by an
Assistant Director Skinner. He is waiting outside to talk to you now.
She is one of the best in treating brain traumas such as Mr. Mulder's.
Hopefully she will be able to answer any questions we have about his
condition." "Thank you so much," she said. "His condition hasn't
improved, has it," looking down at her hands.
"No Ms. Scully, it hasn't. I'm sorry. But it hasn't
so we can be thankful for that." The young doctor smiled at her.
"I am, thank you. Did the Hospital get ahold of his mother yet?"
"We have been trying to call her all night, but no answer yet."
"Alright, thank you." She gave the young doctor a
soft smile and made
her way down the hallway to talk to Skinner.
Skinner was sitting on the bench right outside Mulders' room,
crossed over his chest. He looked as if he had gotten very little
sleep. As soon as he saw Scully walk out of the room he got up and
met her half-way.
"Sir, I uh..."
"Agent Scully, how is he doing?"
"Well Sir, he..." she took a gulp of air; it was
hard saying the
words. "He's not out of the woods yet. The only good thing is that
his condition hasn't worsened. But he still is unconscious. He
suffered severe trauma to the head; they have stopped the bleeding but
until he wakes up there is no way to know if there will be permanent
"I see. I'm so sorry."
"Me too, Sir. The doctor has called in a specialist I am
to meet with
her at 9:00 AM this morning. We are for now just supposed to talk to
him; they say a familiar voice can bring him out if it." Tears began
to well up in her eyes. "I'm sorry, Sir."
"Shh...its okay." He engulfed her in his arms.
Scully didn't know
what to think- she felt so tired still and it *was* nice to lean on
someone, even if it was her boss.
She pulled away from him and wiped her eyes.
"Thank you, Sir. Would you like to come in and see him?"
"Not right now." He looked at her uncomfortably.
"I think you should
head home and have a shower and get cleaned up, maybe grab some extra
clothes. I have given you a Personal Leave of Absence, Dana. I
assumed you would want to be with him at the hospital until he wakes
"Thank you sir, I appreciate it. He will pull through
this- I have to
"I believe he will, Agent Scully." And with that
Skinner began to
walk down the hall. Scully turned and went back in to the room.
"Call me if his condition changes."
Dana took a deep breath and walked back into the room. She
over to the bed and sat back down in her chair.
"Dana, what time is it?"
"A little after 6:00 AM, Mom. I am glad you're up; I am
going to run
to my apartment to grab some stuff and get cleaned up. The
neurosurgeon is coming at 9:00 AM to talk with me. Will you keep an
eye on Mulder for me?"
Maggie looked at her daughter; she seemed so lost. Though she
trying to hold it all together on the outside, she knew her daughter
was crumbling on the inside. She knew it was hard for her to see the
man she loved lying helplessly in a hospital bed.
"Of course Honey."
"Thanks Mom." She blew her mother a kiss and made
down to her car.
Dana grabbed a couple changes of clothes and had a quick shower. She
wasn't hungry so she skipped her usual bran muffin breakfast. She
arrived back at the hospital just in time to meet with the
Fox Mulder didn't know where he was; all he did now was that
cold and dark. He felt so alone. Even more so than when his sister
first disappeared. He desperately wanted to hear Scully's voice
telling him everything was okay, but he sensed she was nowhere around.
<Well Fox old buddy, you have gotten yourself into a dandy situation,
haven't you> he thought to himself.
Dana walked into the Lounge where the neurosurgeon was waiting for
"You must be Agent Scully."
"My name is Kristina Noding. I am the neurosurgeon that
brought in to look at Mr. Mulder's case."
"Nice to meet you, Dr. Noding."
"You too, Miss Scully. Will you have a seat?"
Dana sat down on the hard yellow chairs in the waiting room.
"Please, call me Dana."
"Well Dana, it seems your partner suffered a traumatic
blow to the
head upon impact with the truck. But the bleeding has stopped, and
from what I can tell there should be no permanent damage. Of course,
we won't know for sure until he wakes up."
"Do you have any idea of when that will be?"
"Only time can tell. The best thing for you to do is just
to talk to
him, maybe talk about memories, or things you two have done together.
Also, playing some of his favorite songs tends to help. Anything
familiar is good."
"Thank you very much." Scully looked at her hands
and tried to hold
back the tears.
"Dana, I know you are worried, but right now we can't
worst. You have to have faith that he will be all right."
"I do, its just..."
"He means a great deal to you, doesn't he?" The
young women looked at
Scully with a great deal of concern. She had seen so many distraught
loved ones over her career and this one wasn't any different.
"He has been my partner and best friend for six years
now. I care for
him greatly. I am just not sure he knows that."
"I think he knows."
"I hope so."
"I was reading his case file, and I read you two are
cases of Unexplained Phenomena, is that right?"
"Yes it is- why do you ask?"
"Well, I have had patients who have told me of the other
before. They say they were in a dark place until they heard a voice
calling to them. But on the other side there was a light, and though
it was such a struggle for them to decide which direction to go to, in
the end the voice won. That is why the best and most important thing
for you to do is to talk to him. Make him hear you Dana; if he is as
special as you think he is then you will bring him out of this."
"Wow! Mulder will want to talk to you as soon as he wakes
sounds exactly like what he would say," she said, lightly laughing.
"Well, you tell him I want to talk to him too, okay?"
"Okay, I will. Thank you again."
"I will see you in a few days, or if his condition changes."
Scully got up and walked slowly back to Fox's room. It was
hear Dr. Noding talk like that- she sounded so much like Mulder! She
knew, though, in her heart, that most of what she had said was true.
And that was what Scully planned to do, just talk him out of this
coma. She was not going to lose Fox this time.
She entered his room knowing full well she had a tough job
her. She knew he could be stubborn and she had a feeling this time he
was going to do his best job.
"Dana, what did the doctor say?"
"Well, the bleeding has stopped, and she doesn't think
there will be
any permanent damage. But we won't know that 'til he wakes up. She
said to just talk to him about familiar things."
"Well you and Fox have known each other for a long time,
must be a million stories you can tell him."
"I know, Mom" She softly smiled at her Mother.
"Listen, why don't you
go home? I will call you if anything happens. Also, could you try
and call his mom. No one has been able to get a hold of her yet."
"Of course, Honey." Margaret gave her daughter a
tight hug. "Dana,
just talk to him- maybe that way you'll do both of you some good."
"What do you mean, Mom?"
"Dana, its quite obvious to me how you feel about Fox; I
just wish the
both of you would realize it too."
"Mom, we are partners, that's it."
"Dana Katherine Scully, I am your mother and I know you.
I know how
you feel about him. I see it every time you look at him! Especially
now, seeing you almost lose him. But I believe he will come out of
this, and when he does you must tell him how you feel."
"Mom, I know it will just take some time."
"Of course honey, love does take time." She gave her
another hug and walked over to the hospital bed and gave Fox a
light kiss on the cheek.
"Get well, sweet Fox," she whispered.
Dana sat down in the chair that was pulled up to the hospital
With her mother gone she all of a sudden felt very alone. She pulled
the blanket laying on the table and wrapped it around her legs.
"Well Mulder, seems is just the two of us again. You
these one-sided conversations are not all that fun. I would really
appreciate it if you would wake up and tell me to shut up, get out of
your life, anything Fox! Just say something to me!"
She grabbed hold of his hand and held it tightly. <Well
really are being stubborn this time> He had beenunconscious many times
in the six years they had been partners, but he had always woken up.
Dana thought about a case the, had worked on, the one that had taken
them to Ft. Worth, Texas. The weather had been hot and steamy the
whole time they had been there and Fox had bought that awful T-shirt.
Thinking about it brought a smile to her face.
"Mulder, remember that awful T-shirt you bought in Ft.
I told you to go in and get one cause you kept complaining how hot you
were. Little did I know you'd get one that said 'Aliens do it all year
round'. Jesus Mulder, you never cease to amaze me."
<It would amaze me even more if you'd wake up right
Far off to his right Fox could hear Dana's voice calling to
sounded so sweet. To his left was the light that felt so warm and
loving. He was torn between which to go to: the partner he had grown
to love or the overpowering light. He felt himself being drawn to
Dana's voice, but still the light was so warm.
Dana had been talking to him all day now; her stomach was
from the hunger she felt. She decided it was safe to make a quick
trip to the hospital cafeteria to grab a snack.
"Okay Mulder, I will be right back. If you want you can
and wake up right about now!" She softly smiled and walked out of the
She then made her way to the cafeteria.
Fox was walking towards Dana's voice; he just wanted to see
started to walk faster; barely noticing the white shadow in front of
"Fox, good to see you are making the right decision."
"Yes Fox, it is me. I am just making sure you are going
back to where
"Where I belong?" Fox was very confused.
"You belong with my sister Fox; deep inside I do believe
that. Just look inside yourself and find the truth."
"The truth Melissa..."
"Yes Fox, you will find it if you allow yourself to let
down. You spend so much time angry that you have gotten yourself in
this situation. It's time to stop running from things Fox, and time to
take a look around at what is important to you."
"Melissa, what are you talking about? Where am I?"
"Fox, right now you are in a barrier between the after
life and the
present life. You are here because it is not your time, but only you
can make the decision. You have to decide which side to go to. Go
back to her, Fox. She needs you." Her voice as well as her spirit
drifted off into the deep darkness.
Fox didn't know what to believe anymore. Here he was in a dark
torn between where to go next. He knew Melissa wouldn't lie to him; he
also knew that he did care for Dana and that she was important to him.
He wondered though if it wouldn't be all easier for him to slip away.
He shook himself out of that thought and started to make his way
towards her voice again.
Dana grabbed a tuna sandwich from the cafeteria and a large
laughing at the drink, she walked back up to Mulder's room.
"Mulder, I'm back. Did you miss me?" She grabbed
ahold of his hand
again, and unwrapped the sandwich with the other.
"You know Mulder, I was just thinking about that time
us to that Psychic Fair. God knows you did not want to go, but to
please my sister you went." Scully smiled softly at the thought of her
"Come on Mulder, hurry up! Melissa is down in the car
"Jesus Scully, how the hell did I let you talk me into this?"
"Mulder quite complaining! I told you that you would owe
me a favor
after the last batch of reports I typed up for you."
"I know, I know--remind me next time to do them
myself." He grumbled
as he walked out of his bedroom.
"Will do Mulder," she smirked. "So are you just about ready to go?"
"Ya, ya, just let me grab my shoes, okay?"
"Sure Mulder, no problem. Listen, you aren't going to be
day are you? Its our first day off in a long time. Let's just enjoy
it. Deal?" She extended her hand.
"Deal Scully, but I tell ya if Melissa starts going off
on one of her
'you and Dana are meant for each other' spiels I am going to strangle
"Mulder, she just does that to infuriate you; if you
would just ignore
her she would stop."
"Okay Scully, lets just go."
Mulder grabbed his black leather jacket from his chair and
Scully out of his apartment. What had he gotten himself into? He
loved spending time with Scully and all, but a psychic fair? Not that
he wasn't a believer in psychic ability; it was just that he didn't
believe in all those fakes out there. He was sure that some people
had the ability to see in the future, just not all those that claimed
to be able to.
"Fox, so glad to see you are on time as always."
"Nice to see you too, Melissa."
"Will you two stop it? Just get in the car Mulder."
Scully found it
entertaining to watch her sister and her partner banter back and
"Yes Ma'am!" He saluted Scully and crawled into the
back seat. "Kind
of a tight squeeze back here, isn't it?" Mulder's long, lanky legs
were squished up against the back of the passenger seat.
"Just give me a minute would you?" Scully said,
pulling the chair up
as far as it would go.
"Ahh... much better."
"So Missy, how long is it going to take us to get there?"
"Well, the place is about forty-five minutes away, so
will take us just under an hour-- of course that all depends on the
"Hey Melissa, got any good music in here?"
"Well Fox, that all depends on your taste in music."
She smiled. "I
have some great new age stuff I just bought; how about that?"
"No, no, anything but that, please! Even Scully's singing
"Thanks a lot, Mulder. Just for that I am going to make
you listen to
all of my Cher albums on our next stakeout."
"Scully nooo! Please? Okay I am sorry, you sing
threw his arms up in defeat.
"Thank you, Mulder."
"Geez, is this going to be one of those 'Gang Up On Mulder' days?"
"Fox, of course not! We Scully sisters would never dream
that." Melissa said laughing.
"So Mulder, what do you want to listen to?"
"Just put the radio on, would ya Scully? Station KIXN 98.5 is good."
"Okay Mulder; good choice." Scully turned the dial
to the station.
The song that was playing was a favorite of her's and she couldn't
help but want to sing along, but for Mulder's sake she kept quiet.
"So Fox, ready to find out that you and my sister are
"Missy quit it, okay? I promised Mulder you'd behave."
"Okay, okay, but he knows I only tease him cause I love
him-- like a
brother-in- law I might add."
"Missy, that's enough!"
In the backseat Fox was reddening. It was only a Scully he
get away with this teasing. Usually he was one to give it right back,
but when it came to the Scully clan he tended to be more understanding
of it. He knew Melissa was only bugging him and part of him knew that
some of what she said had some truth to it.
"Wake me up when we get there," Mulder grimaced.
"Aww Fox, I'm sorry. Forgive me?"
"Sure Melissa, just let me know when were there."
As Dana was telling the story, she felt a surge of sadness rush over
her. She had already lost Missy and now she was terrified that she
might lose Mulder too.
"Mulder you have to listen to me okay? Now I know right
now you are
somewhere far away and you think that you are happy there. But believe
me, Fox, I can't live without you! I need you to come back to me.
Please Fox, please!" Dana lay her head across his chest and cried
silently. She let herself be lulled to sleep by the beating of his
"Fox please," she silently moaned.
"Hush child, you must realize that a man is a great
is of no exception."
"What? Who are you?" Dana raised her head and in
front of her was an
old women dressed in a white gown, her eyes sparkling in the dimness
of the room.
"I am the spirit of your love for Fox. Right now your
working overtime to get him out of where he is bound to. What you
have to do is channel all your strength and love for him and make him
come back to you."
"A spirit?" <Snap out of it, Dana.>
"Dana, you are not imagining me; I am as real as you are.
overseen your's and Fox's life from the time you first met. A long
time ago, in another place, you and Fox were lovers; soulmates if you
will. And as you both have encountered new lives you have kept
contact with each other; your souls have always been connected in some
way or another. Now is the time for you to be lovers again. Your
love for him can not be denied. In fact, it won't be. But that is
something you yourself must realize, child."
Dana was about to speak again but the old woman vanished as
she came. She was sure she was imaging things, but she seemed so real!
Dana didn't know what to believe anymore; everything that was
happening was like a movie to her. It was not reality.
<Oh Fox,> She thought. <wherever you are, please come back.>
She was growing tired. That and the fact that she needed to be
to him that caused her to crawl up beside him in his hospital bed.
Not caring how it would look to those who walked into his room, she
snuggled up to his warm body and wrapped her arms around him and lay
her head on his chest once again. Within a few moments she was fast
Fox Mulder was walking quickly away from the light, and
voice. He heard behind him Melissa saying, "Go Fox, go back to my
sister". He just hoped he wasn't too late, that it wasn't too late
for them. He realized a long time ago that he did love her; he just
didn't say anything, for he valued her friendship much more. How
often in your life do you find someone who understands you as well as
Dana understood him? Not often, he thought.
Dana had fallen asleep curled around Fox's body; she wasn't
how long she had been sleeping, but she felt so warm there wrapped
around him. Slowly she became aware of her surroundings and crawled
out of his bed. She sat back down on the cold leather seat. Her eyes
were puffy and red, for she had been crying for almost two days
straight now. She thought of a song that she had once heard a long
Spare a little candle and save some light for me
Things up ahead moving in the trees
white skin in linen
perfume on my wrist
and the full moon that hangs over
these dreams in the mist
Darkness on the edge
shadows where I stand
I search for the time of a watch with my hands
I want to see you clearly come closer in the mist
but all I remember are the dreams in the mist
These dreams go on when I close my eyes
every second of the night I live another life
these dreams that sleep while its cold outside
every moment of the wake further on the way
Oh how this song reminded her of Mulder, always searching for
dreams in the mist. Constantly in a struggle for himself; he was a boy
who had to grow up too fast. She blamed his father for that, though.
>From all that he had told her and some that she could just sense, she
knew how hard it must have been for him once his sister had
disappeared. He was always reliving it no matter what happened to
him, Everyday he was reminded of that night. And there was no way for
Dana to stop the pain for him. She could only be there for him when
he needed her though somehow she even failed him at that.
"You're almost there Fox, just a little further."
Fox began to sprint towards the direction of Dana's voice. All
wanted to do was see her face, then he would know that everything
would be okay. She would tell him in her way; that all was okay. And
he would be at peace looking at her, knowing that she was there for
him all the time.
"You know Mulder, if you were to wake up I would kiss you
and now. I wouldn't even worry about the repercussions," she said,
wiping the few stray tears from her eyes.
"MMM... you serious Scully?"
"Mulder? Mulder I am so glad to hear your groggy
welled up in her eyes.
"Hey, what about my kiss?"
Dana bent down and wrapped her arms around Fox's body and held
a long time. She softly placed a kiss on his lips.
"Oww! Dana let go would ya."
"Fox." Dana was unsure of how he would react to her
calling him that,
but at that moment she didn't care. "I am never letting you go."
"Dana,you don't know how long I have been waiting to hear
"Mulder you stay here; I am going to go get the doctor."
"Where am I gonna go?" he said, giving her a weak smile.
Please send all comments to email@example.com
>From firstname.lastname@example.org Thu Mar 13 01:58:03 1997
Subject: NEW The Accident (a companion piece) (1/1)
From: Laurie <email@example.com>
Date: Wed, 12 Mar 1997 23:58:03 -0800 (PST)
******Please Don't send to ATXC*********
Disclaimer: The Characters in this story belong to Chris Carter and 1013
productions. I'm only borrowing them for a little while:)
PLEASE NOTE: This is a companion piece to the story "The Accident" which I
(the sender) wrote. You should really read that before you read this. A
friend of mine wanted to write a piece to go with it, from the POV of
Skinner. I DID NOT write this, please send all feedback to Rachel Carper at
The Accident (a companion piece)
By Rachel Carper
Skinner reached for the phone before the ringing reached his
"Skinner," he stated wondering what in God's name had gone wrong
now. As an agent he had become used to being woken in the middle of the
night. But as an Assistant Director those calls took on new meaning. He was
now responsible for all his agents and contacting families when necessary.
He felt his heart drop as he listened to the voice on the other
end. "Who has been contacted?" he questioned as he stood and reached for a
pair of pants. "I see. I'll be right down."
He finished dressing and headed out the door. From long habit he
had his gun. He drove to the hospital memories running unchecked through
his mind. He remembered the first time he met Mulder. The first real
argument they had. He wondered when he began to consider Mulder a friend.
He had always admired the man. Had read his personal file almost in awe.
That the man could be so stubborn and determined. And Scully. She was right
there with him at all times. *They* must be very disappointed that *that*
plan had not worked.
He wondered how Scully was holding up. The hospital had said they'd
called her mother and were trying to reach Mulder's mother. He doubted
they'd reach Mulder's mother. From what he had been ascertained she wasn't
overly concerned with her son.
He pulled into the parking garage and went into the hospital. He
went right to the ICU unit and stopped to talk to the nurse on duty. "I'm
Assistant Director Skinner. You have one of my men here. I'd like to see
his file and speak to his doctor."
The nurse blinked at him. "Um, I'll have to check to see if you can
look at the file."
Skinner sighed and watched her walk away. He reached over the
counter and picked up Mulder hospital file. He began to read. He wished
Scully were here to explain the medical jargon to him. He looked around for
her. "Excuse me," he asked a passing nurse. "Do you know where Agent Scully
She looked at him, and smiled. "She's in the patients room."
Skinner went over to Mulder's door and opened it quietly. He saw
Scully sitting next to the bed holding Mulder's hand talking to him. He saw
that she was crying. She didn't seem to noticed the tears flowing down her
face. That scared Skinner. He had never seen Scully anything but in
control. He backed out of the room and quietly closed the door. He turned
back to the nurses station. The nurse and a doctor walked up.
"Doctor this is Assistant Director Skinner. He had some questions
about Agent Mulder." she noticed that Skinner was holding Mulder's file in
his hands. She reached out for it and was surprised by the glare Skinner
directed at her. She backed off and returned to her station.
"Doctor, who is the best in this field?" Skinner wasted no time asking.
"That would be Doctor...." he replied.
"How do I get in touch with her?"
"We can call her in for a consultation, but it's a little unusual."
"Doctor, my Agents don't go down without a fight. And if they can't
do the fighting themselves I do it for them. Agent Mulder is going to have
opportunity this hospital and the medical field can offer." Skinner held
the file out to the doctor.
The doctor took the folder and smiled at Skinner. Mulder's chances
just went up. "You can go in to see him if you wish. Agent Scully is with
him, and I believe her mother is on her way."
"No, thank you. I think I'll leave Scully her privacy. I'll be in
the waiting room."
Skinner went down the hall to the waiting room and sat in the
plastic chairs. After about an hour he saw Margaret Scully arrive and go
into Mulder's hospital room. He leaned his head back against the wall and
waited. He would never get used to this. Since taking over as Assistant
Director he had lost two agents. Both losses had involved long hospital
waits and then *the* conversation with the family. God, he hated that. He
wouldn't allow himself to think that Fox Mulder would go out due to a drunk
driver. It was way too mundane for him. Besides Mulder was a fighter.
Skinner had proof of that. When Scully had disappeared he was unstoppable.
And when Mulder had disappeared in New Mexico. Skinner had a report from a
friend on the reservation. Someday he would have to figure out how to put
that information on Mulder's personal records. The elders at the
reservation thought very highly of him. No Skinner wouldn't loose Mulder
this way. Not the same way he had lost Ted.
Skinner shook off the old regrets of his lost partner. This was not
the time for that. He looked up and saw a nurse enter Mulder's room. When
she exited the room Skinner got up and walked down the hall. "How is he?"
"Oh, Mr. Skinner. I thought you'd left. There is no change. I'm
sure Mrs. Mulder and her mother would not mind if you joined them."
"I'm sure Agent Scully and her mother have much to discuss without
me, but thank you."
The nurse blushed over her obvious mistake. Strange, from the way
the two women were acting she could have sworn. . . Oh well. She turned
and walked away.
Skinner stood undecided outside the door for several more minutes.
Finally he took a step forward and opened the door. He saw both Scully
women were sleeping fitfully in their chairs. He looked around and walked
up to the bed. He noticed one molded plastic chair in the room. He pulled
it up to the bed and sat. After a few moments he began to talk.
"I don't think it's your time Mulder. There is too much left for
you to do here. I know you don't think I approve of you or your actions.
Actually you have always impressed me. Your devotion to your job and
beliefs is most impressive. You remind me of my youth. Back when I
believed." Skinner paused and looked out the window. A doctor came in to
check on Mulder and Skinner moved out of his way. He stood behind Margaret
Scully and noticed she awakened for a moment. She looked at the doctor and
then fell asleep again. Once the doctor left Skinner retook his seat.
"When we first met, I didn't believe in *them*. I must admit I
thought you were paranoid. I soon learned my mistake." Again Skinner paused
and looked out the window.
He stood and put the chair back where he had found it. "I guess
what I'm trying to say, Mulder," Skinner stopped and took a deep breath. "I
guess, well, I admire you, you have become perhaps my closest friend. I do
not want to loose you."
With that Skinner turned and left the room. He found himself
wandering the hospital hallways. Why was this so hard. When he had lost his
partner, Ted, to a drunk driver he had promised himself he would never let
anybody get this close again. Now here he was again.
For some reason he found himself outside of the nursery.
Parenthood had never held any appeal for him. He didn't think he had the
emotions or acceptance for it. He stood and watched a couple of bleary eyed
new fathers. Their faces shared the same look of wonder. Skinner briefly
wondered what kind of children Mulder and Scully would produce. If they
ever got past *their* fears. Skinner glanced at his watch. Almost five
o'clock. He headed back to Mulder's room.
Skinner stopped at the nurses desk for an update. They had gotten
hold of Dr. Noding. She would be there at 9 a.m. Skinner nodded. The
hospital doctor came up to him. "Is there something I can get you Mr.
"No I'm fine thank you. When Agent Scully awakens will you tell her
I'd like to speak with her?"
"Of course, Sir." The doctor paused. now why had he called Skinner
Sir? He hadn't done that in years. Must be the man's bearing.
Skinner sat down on the bench outside Mulder's door to wait. At 6
A.M. he heard Scully and the doctor talking. He looked up as she came out
of the room. he stood and crossed the hall to meet her.
"Sir, I uh..."
"Agent Scully, how is he doing?" Skinner stood listening to Scully
try to get the words out. He wished there were some way he could comfort
"Well Sir, he..." she took a gulp of air; it was
hard saying the
words. "He's not out of the woods yet. The only good thing is
that his condition hasn't worsened. But he still is unconscious.
He suffered severe trauma to the head; they have stopped the
bleeding but until he wakes up there is no way to know if there
will be permanent damage."
"I see. I'm so sorry." Lame, he thought. He had
never been good with words.
"Me too, Sir. The doctor has called in a specialist I am
with her at 9:00 AM this morning. We are for now just
supposed to talk to him; they say a familiar voice can bring him
out if it." Tears began to well up in her eyes. "I'm sorry, Sir."
"Shh...its okay." He engulfed her in his arms. This
at least he could
offer. He knew she needed to hear that everything would be fine, but he had
never lied to his agents before and he wouldn't start now. Hope was the
only thing he had to offer. And he didn't know what good it would do coming
from a man who had given it up years ago.
She pulled away from him and wiped her eyes.
"Thank you, Sir. Would you like to come in and see
"Not right now." He looked at her uncomfortably
wondering if she might
have woken when he had been in Mulder's room.. "I think you
should head home and have a shower and get cleaned up,
maybe grab some extra clothes. I have given you a Personal
Leave of Absence, Dana. I assumed you would want to be
with him at the hospital until he wakes up."
"Thank you sir, I appreciate it. He will pull through
this- I have
to believe that."
"I believe he will, Agent Scully." Skinner looked
over her head and
noticed Margaret standing in the door. He nodded and turned to walk down
the hall. He stopped and turned around.
"Call me when his condition changes."
Skinner continued out to his car. He glanced at his Marine
watch. Still early. He got in his car and headed home. A quick shower and a
cup of coffee later Skinner sat in his living room looking out across his
balcony. He had better get in to the office. One agent down did not mean
the entire Bureau stopped.
Somehow the day passed. Skinner had his assistant, Kim, phone the
hospital at regular intervals for updates. No change. When he left the
office at the end of the day he forgot his briefcase. He had never done
that before. Even more strange he didn't notice until he got home and
reached for it. Skinner at left over take out something and got his bottle
of JB. He turned on the ball game and sat having a drink. After and hour he
could take it no longer. He admitted defeat. He stood and grabbed his car
Twenty minutes later some damn state trooper was pulling him
Christ. Didn't they see the federal plates. Skinner had his id out before
the police officer reached his window.
"Sir, do you realize you were doing 80 in a 45 mile zone?" the
Shit! Had he really been going that fast?
"No, I wasn't aware of that. I'm in a hurry. One of my agents is in
the hospital." Now why had he explained that? he wondered.
The police officer looked at his badge and radioed the information
in. After receiving conformation that Skinner was who the badge said he was
the officer returned to Skinner's window. "Sir, perhaps you should use your
siren." with that the officer turned to his car.
Skinner looked in his rear view mirror. What siren? He pulled out
into traffic and kept his speed to 65. When he arrived at the hospital he
went straight to Mulder's room. Again he quietly opened the door. Agent
Scully was sitting next to the bed talking to Mulder.
"You know Mulder, if you were to wake up I would kiss you
right here and now. I wouldn't even worry about the
repercussions," she said, wiping the few stray tears from her
"MMM... you serious Scully?"
Skinner stepped back and closed the door. A wide grin
his face. He put his hands in his pockets and rocked on the ball of his
feet for a moment. Then he turned and headed back to his car. He was
pulling out of the parking garage when his cell phone rang.
"Sir, it's me, Scully. Sir, Mulder has woken up." She sounded joyful.
"That's good to hear, Scully. Thank you for calling. Tell him I'll
be by tomorrow." The grin was back on Skinner's face. He headed home.
Looked like the good guys would be back in action soon.